Jessie J is opening up to fans about her miscarriage.
Jessie, 33, took to Instagram hours before her Los Angeles concert on Wednesday to make the personal announcement. The “Masterpiece” singer preferred to share the news with fans online as opposed to on stage.
“Yesterday morning, I was laughing with a friend saying ‘seriously though how am I going to get through my gig in LA tomorrow night without telling the whole audience I am pregnant,'” she capioned the post. “By yesterday afternoon, I was dreading the thought of getting through the gig without breaking down… After going for my third scan and being told there was no longer a heartbeat.
“This morning. I feel like I have no control of my emotions. I may regret posting this. I may not. I actually don’t know. What I do know is that I want to sing tonight. Not because I’m avoiding the grief or the process, but because I know singing tonight will help me. I have done two shows in two years and my soul needs it. Even more today. I know some people will be thinking she should just cancel it. But in this moment I have clarity on one thing.”
For Jessie, singing is therapy.
“I started singing when I was young for joy, to fill my soul and self love therapy, that hasn’t ever changed and I have to process this my way,” she continued. “I want to be honest and true and not hide what I’m feeling. I deserve that. I want to be as myself as I can be in this moment. Not just for the audience but for myself and my little baby that did it’s best. I know myself and I know I would talk about it on stage because that’s who I am. So instead of a tearful emotional speech trying to explain my energy. This feels safer.
I decided to have a baby on my own. Because it’s all I’ve ever wanted and life is short. To get pregnant was a miracle in itself and an experience I will never forget and I know I will have again. I’m still in shock, the sadness is overwhelming. But I know I am strong, and I know I will be ok. I also know millions of women all over the world have felt this pain and way worse. I feel connected to those of you I know and those of you I don’t. It’s the loneliest feeling in the world. So I will see you tonight LA. I may crack less jokes but my heart will be in the room.”