Your property, your rules, right? Well, that’s not how everyone thinks. Reddit user TripleDigitMan recently shared a story on the platform that struck a nerve with thousands: a young local boy pretending to be a pirate took his games onto the guy’s yard and started “burying treasures” into his lawn. The Redditor said this wouldn’t have been a problem on its own, but after he informed the kid’s mom about what happened, she not only refused to teach the little one a lesson about boundaries, but also insulted his grass.
Ideally, neighbors should be able to find a way to balance community and privacy
Image credits: Devon MacKay / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
But this homeowner doesn’t appreciate a local boy playing in his yard, and he believes his parents are the problem
Image credits: Allan Mas / Pexels (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Andrej Lišakov / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
Image credits: TripleDigitMan
People shouldn’t feel guilty about setting boundaries with their neighbors
Clinical psychologist Emily Edlynn, PhD, says harmonious neighborhoods and tight-knit communities bestow many benefits on families: in this era, many of us live far from grandparents and other relatives, and having a village to help raise a child becomes a necessity.
“We hope our children form long-lasting friendships with neighborhood kids, not just for convenience but because of trust, since we are more likely to know the parents and everyone is keeping an eye on everyone else,” Edlynn writes. “But obviously, there can be too much of a good thing, and preferences for privacy differ by family.”
“Coexisting well in neighborhoods requires understanding and respecting this range of preferences. Some may see sitting outside as an open invitation for company, while others wait for an actual invitation to play. Since your neighbors appear to see an open invitation, they need some explicit guidance around your family’s privacy needs, which deserve priority,” the psychologist explains.
Edlynn believes you can combine kindness with firmness, and if others disrespect your boundary-setting attempts, you may need to level up your efforts. It may seem strange at first after a more free-wheeling approach, but the free-wheeling not working for you is enough of a reason to enact change.
“As tempting as it can be to avoid potential neighbor conflict, that might mean years of living with a setup that doesn’t work for your family,” Edlynn says. “It’s worth it to address the problem now by knowing your boundaries and communicating that to your neighbors clearly and kindly.” In the long run, this should preserve harmony rather than disturb it. Plus, it can teach the kids how healthy boundaries work.
People who read the story thought the man did nothing wrong
