Probably it’s no surprise that often men and women are being treated differently in their relationships. Of course, not always it is an issue - it depends on what a person is expecting from their partner, how they want to be treated and what actions or behavior are important to them. However, while we have a few ‘norms’ that are engraved in society and still followed by many, what are the roles of men and women in relationships, I think it’s safe to say that it’s finally changing.

So speaking about that - one Reddit user created a thread online asking netizens to share things that men don’t really get to experience in relationships while women do. Needless to say, folks online shared their personal stories and listed things that they did for their partners that were considered unusual and how they made them feel.

More info: Reddit

#1

I sent my husband flowers, at his workplace, on his birthday once. Then I kept thinking,I wonder if I had done the right thing. He was the boss and maybe his staff would rib him about them but he came home absolutely thrilled.

He said the female staff members are always getting flowers but he was the only male who had gotten any.

Image credits: PaisleyPatchouli

#2

My bf borrowed one of my baggy hoodies last week to take our trash out real quick. When he came in, he said how this must be how girls feel when they steal their bf’s hoodies; he didn’t wanna give it back ?.

Image credits: FartAttack911

“Women have a stronger need for connection. Their brain's connection center is larger and they are more wired for connection and togetherness,” shared Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT, personal development and relationship expert, who is also the founder and director of Metropolitan Marriage and Family Therapy, PLLC, with Bored Panda.

She added that women have a stronger sense of 'We' and operate more to take care of the whole and others. “Where men are more 'Me' focused and are wired more for independence.”

#3

Not a relationship but friendship. My friend brought me salt and chocolate from Europe, and that s**t meant so much to me. I've never received a gift from a friend for no reason before. The fact that she was thinking of me when buying gifts just makes me feel lucky.

I will treasure our friendship till the day I die lol.

Image credits: odd_leo

#4

For example the other day I brought a little lunch box and a handwritten card to work for my boyfriend. He texted me right away saying this is first time he got a card, how touched he was, how happy he was. (Mind you, this guy had a certain number of girlfriends.)

Little did I expect it to also be a shared experience - a video call with him next morning with all his friends pushing in the screen telling me how happy he was last night and how they all enjoyed my food.

Image credits: BootyOffBright

Emma K. Viglucci explained that women are more sensitive to safety issues and need for security. “They are usually more verbal processors and circular in their thinking—men are more internal and linear—so women need to talk about their concerns to better understand what is happening for them.”

Speaking more about the distinctive experiences that women frequently face in relationships, which men may not typically encounter, the expert noted that their feelings get dismissed more because they are considered emotional and less logical and significant. Because of these stereotypes, they also frequently get mansplained at.

Moreover, women face more expectations and judgment about their weight, fitness, grooming, clothing and appearance. “They are expected to know more about caretaking and nurturing, and maintaining relationships, social calendar, and gifting.”

#5

When i was with my ex, we took a vacation and i LOVED taking pics of him. I remember when he was looking through some of the pics, and he said “ive never had anyone take pictures of me like this” and he just looked so genuinely happy.

Image credits: espressokitty23

#6

I drive 2 hours to visit my girl for a few days when I get off work around 10pm and she gives me gas money. I almost started crying the first time lmao.

Image credits: VergaDeVergas

However, on a good note, we asked Viglucci if she has observed any shifts or change in these dynamics over recent years due to evolving gender roles and expectations—“Absolutely!”

She noted that men have become more open, expressive, nurturing, more involved in domestic matters and in relationship nurturing, more open about their insecurities, and more receptive and open to women's intelligence and financial contributions, to name a few.

#7

Being told I’m attractive. Held. Cuddled. Spooned.

Image credits: Accomplished_Egg6239

#8

Regular compliments, men dont get them often. In fact I still remember a girl who complimented my eyebrows nearly 10 years ago ?.

Image credits: MrBallTickler2

Finally, speaking about misconceptions that people might have about these experiences, Viglucci emphasized that in her work, she notices most that partners still may not fully line up in terms of gender role expectations—one might be more old fashioned and the other more progressive.

“They might both have expectations line up more traditionally in some areas, but not others, creating confusion for the couple and potential conflict,” she shared. “This shows up the most in division of labor in the home and shared responsibilities, and finances.”

#9

I had a gf that would defend me (or rather my oppinions/ decisions) against others at any cost. Even when I knew she'd disagree personally.

When I asked her why, she basically said "You are my man, and I want evrybody to know that you are the best thing that can happen to anybody. So they need to know that I stand 100% behind you." I found that a little odd, but it was a great feeling to have someone that has your back this way. She never spoke bad about me and would always tell anyone how great I was.

Image credits: I_wood_rather_be

#10

I sent my boyfriend flowers, just because I love him, and miss him, no special occasion.

I wrote a card in his native language (with some help) and he thought at first that it was either the church he affiliated or maybe his parents. When he read the card and realized it was me, he was very happy and said it was the first time he got flowers (ever).

Never seen a brighter smile.

Guys deserve flowers too!

Image credits: madcurly

And what about you guys? What are some things that, in your opinion or experiences, women experience in relationships, but men, less so? Share your thoughts in the comments below!

#11

I always get the better thing. If we're at a show or sporting event, he gives me the better seat. If we split something, he makes sure I get the better half, I get the better plane seat, etc. I try to let/force him to take the better option but he will not under any circumstances accept it. This could be an age thing though. We're 44 and 46.

Edited to add, I do most of the cooking so when I plate our food, I will give him the better looking plate. He doesn't know though so he doesn't know what it's like to experience.

Image credits: Hedgehog_Insomniac

#12

I am so unused to gifts that I actually don't like receiving them.

Image credits: notameliaaa

#13

Being pursued or complimented. I dated quite a bit when I was younger and have been married 6 years. I have no clue what any of these women liked about me. About 4 years into our marriage I asked my wife (admittedly not a super eloquent person) and she said a few things but they were all things I do and not things about me.

Image credits: Street_Ad_3822

#14

People recognize the effort that moms get, but in 10years of being a dad. Only my own dad has recognized my effort.

Image credits: brownlawn

#15

Getting called "girls" while men get to be called men.

Image credits: greeneyedwench

#16

Gonna admit from experience that its probably... Stable affection. Unless the guy is a little unhinged, they'll care even when we physically cannot care about them back (in the middle of a fit).

Image credits: samaaronwhiting

#17

Unprompted affection. Security. The extreme luxury of not having to make the first move and potentially putting your reputation on the line if that move is unwanted, because men won't accuse you of being a creep unless you are literally threatening them with violence, doxxing, or stalking them, they'll be grateful you see them in that way but decline if they're not interested. Women however will accuse you of being a creep for simply being socially awkward but still showing interest.

Image credits: WMan37

#18

Being picked up and carried.

Image credits: jirukiolm

#19

I’ve never received a heartfelt, thoughtful gift. I’ve always gotten the stereotypical man gifts (e.g. socks, ties, a shirt).

It’s peculiar to me because I have so many interests. I love watches, hand tools, motorcycles, hiking, reading, computers, etc.

Image credits: Nankilslas

#20

Revealing their true, deep down feelings about whats on their mind. thats definitely not to say girls can’t be loving,accepting caring partners. But I would say that most guys I know have only revealed their truest darkest thoughts to another male friend. again, not to say girls dont have difficulties in relationships too.

Image credits: Technical-Chips-580

#21

Getting fetched from, walked or driven home.

Image credits: Haru112

#22

How effortless it is in the beginning.

Men usually have to initiate the first conversation.

Image credits: PartGlobal1925

#23

Being able to tell your partner that they did something which upset you without having to apologise to them afterwards.

Image credits: TimeThief_

#24

Just once in my life, I'd love it if a woman I was romantically involved with actually spent money on me. A surprise video game or Lego set, or any pricy non practical thing I wouldn't normally buy for myself.

Don't get me wrong. I fully recognize that plenty of men do, in fact, get spoiled by their S/O's. It just seems like 90% of the time, it's usually the men doing the big gift giving, while women will just throw [intercourse] at you and call it good.

Image credits: j7style

#25

Kinda random but men in a relationship are absolutely never allowed to lose their temper. Whereas you have to be respectful if the woman is mentally having a hard time.