“Retail Workers, What’s The Dumbest Thing You’ve Had To Explain To A Customer?” (45 Stories)


No, no, no—The customer is not always right! Ideally, everyone walking into any shop would be patient, polite, and well-versed in common sense. Unfortunately, those qualities are in short supply these days. This means that the staff has to smile, stay professional, and avoid facepalming, even when dealing with completely delulu shoppers.


The retail workers of the r/AskReddit online community recently opened up about the “dumbest things” that they’ve ever had to explain to their customers, and this is a whole other level of cluelessness. We’ve collected some of the most interesting stories to share with you. Scroll down to have a read, and don’t forget to upvote the posts that blew you away the most.


#1

I didn’t make your drink wrong, Amy. You ordered a large hot drink, and immediately after paying the barista put out a small cold drink and yelled “Jennifer.” Then, Amy, you picked it up and *took a sip* before realizing it was not your large, hot drink.



Shift lead sent me on break before I had a chance to fully explode.

Image credits: BetaOscarBeta


#2

I, as a Walmart stocker, do not control the chemicals inside kids' toys.

Image credits: chevy1500


#3

Used to work in a computer store, someone asked me once if a mouse mat would work with Windows 7. I worry about some people on this planet..

Image credits: EntityManiac


If you’re working in retail, sooner or later, you will have to deal with someone who’s completely clueless, irritable, rude, or trying to pull the wool over your eyes. It’s part of the job. Any position that requires you to interact with a large number of people is going to show you just how varied humanity is. Sure, most of your customers are probably going to be decent folks. But a small handful of them are probably going to try to ruin your day, whether they mean to or not.


One important thing for retail workers to do is to try to figure out whether their problematic customer is simply having a bad day or if rudeness and entitlement are part of their character. To put it bluntly, after a bout of bad luck, many of us have probably snapped at a stranger when we didn’t mean to. An insightful employee who’s well-versed in empathy is going to be able to recognize that.


#4

"Why are you shut tomorrow?"

"Uhh...because its Christmas day?"

"But what if I need something?"

"You...youre in the store now? Just buy it now?"

"But I dont *need* it now!"

"......".

Image credits: pajmage


#5

"Putting that washing machine on the roof of your Golf is a bad idea."



No exaggeration, it happened.

Image credits: Hydraulis


#6

It smells like dirt because it’s a greenhouse and that’s where we plant the plants. 



Also sun loving means it loves the sun. .

Image credits: starkpaella


Broadly speaking, when working in retail, it’s vital to stay professional, no matter what happens. Your company likely has a guidebook where it lists what it expects all its staff to do when faced with unhappy customers. There’s often a clear protocol. Some businesses also invest in training their workers, teaching them how to de-escalate tense situations. Though roleplaying some common scenarios can be a good teaching tool, it still might not prepare you for the real thing.


In real life, your customers can throw you some curveballs and behave in completely unexpected ways. They might be unwilling to hear you out, even if you’ve got the solution and you’re trying to help them. If the situation is getting out of hand and it’s too much to handle, there’s no shame in asking for some help from a senior employee or your supervisor. They likely have more experience with handling these super-niche scenarios with problematic customers.


#7

The elevator had a sign that read 'out of order', Customer asked if it was out of order on all of the floors.

Image credits: andsusie


#8

That if you tell the self-checkout 'No, I don't want my receipt, it won't print out your receipt.

Image credits: Le_Gazzo_Ladro


#9

I work in a deli. We've gotten some doozies. "What flavor are the plain breaded wings?" "Chicken." -from my wife.



My personal favorite that happened to me, went as such:



Customer: "Hi, I'd like some sliced chicken lunch meat, what you got?"



Me: "We carry oven roasted, buffalo, and garlic & herb."



Customer: You're not understanding me boy! I want sliced chicken lunch meat, now what you got?"



Me: "Oven roasted, buffalo, or garlic & herb."



Customer: "You're still not gettin' me son, I want sliced chicken lunch meat! Now tell me what you have, dammit!"



Me: "Oven roasted, chicken lunch meat. Buffalo, chicken lunch meat. Garlic and herb, chicken lunch meat."



Customer: "Oh. Uhhhhh gimme some balogna."



Still don't know how I didn't get in trouble for sassing that f****r.

Image credits: Chaoticist523


Once your colleague or manager steps in to help, pay close attention to what they say, how they say it, and what their body language is like. It’s very likely that they’ll exude an aura of confidence and calm. They’ll probably try to offer the customer some solutions, apologize a bit, and thank them for their concerns.


Politeness can be a very powerful tool in your arsenal, especially when facing overwhelming rudeness. You have to try to resist the impulse to raise your voice and insult the customer. That being said, if they are being abusive, you do not have to tolerate their behavior: you or your manager can ask them to leave. Good companies will have protocols in place to protect their staff in these scenarios. 


#10

Back when I was in college I worked at a McDonald's I spent tne better part of 30 minutes explaining to a person that a cheeseburger with no cheese was in fact just called a hamburger.

Image credits: Doc_Of_Chaos


#11

I've had to explain to customers that their coupon has to actually be for the product they're buying. Yes, a $3 coupon for a skin care product is a good coupon, however I cannot apply it to your cereal purchase.

Image credits: Witty_Commentator


#12

That the lamp she was trying to return did not have a defective cord, but had a protective plastic cap over the plug that needed to be removed.

Image credits: bunbeck13


#13

(Phone call when I worked in a hardware store)



"Good morning, , how can I help you?"



"Hi there. I'd like to refill my prescription"



"Oh, I'm sorry - I think you have the wrong number. This is a hardware store"



<5 second pause>



"So you won't help me refill my prescription?"



"What sort of prescription?"



"My birth control pill"



"OK well we're a hardware store, so we don't have birth control or any other medication"



"You're not being very helpful at all"



And then she hung up...



I might have done society a disservice by not helping prevent her from procreating, come to think about it...

Image credits: GraniteBoy


#14

Dumbest thing, or customer, I had to explain is that there is no such thing as "lo cal" or lo calorie honey. It's f*****g "local" for cryin out loud. F*CK.

Image credits: TEAMTINU


#15

You can't return this TV because it has a cracked screen, if I can see the boot print.



Dude threw a punch at me over the counter in front of his wife and infant daughter.

Image credits: Ramiren


#16

Back when printers at home were rare I had a woman come into my store asking for t-shirt transfer paper. I explained to her multiple times how to use them. Print on the paper then pin to shirt then iron.



30 minutes later she came back with the printer and paper wanting a refund because the shirt got stuck in the printer.

Image credits: MNJayW


#17

Customer: What's the difference between the 17-inch monitor and the 19-inch monitor?



Me: Two inches and 40 dollars.



Customer: But what's the difference?



Me: This one is bigger by two inches, measured diagonally, and more expensive by 40 dollars.



Customer: No, but what's the *difference?!*



This went on for several minutes. He left without making a purchase.

Image credits: HawaiianShirtsOR


#18

Retail banking:



Had to explain to a costumer why the balance that was printed on his receipt from Friday afternoon after a deposit wasn’t the same the next morning after he bought a pair of jeans. .

Image credits: burner46


#19

I used to work at a Goodwill. Guy rolled up with a 5 bag donation of mowed grass clippings and told me very nonchalantly to just "take 'em".

Image credits: RosesUnderCypresses


#20

A coupon for a free gift with purchase, mailed out in April, said “now - May 15th”. Customer came in June looking for his free gift and was pissed we didn’t have it anymore. He kept saying “but it says now!”.

Image credits: QueenOfCaffeine842


#21

That watermelons don't grow on trees. And this was back in the days before these personal-sized seedless watermelons...back when they were like 20lbs. A woman was complaining that all of the watermelons were flat on one side and kind of yellow. I told her that was the side that was on the ground. She looked angry and surprised and asked, "What do you mean, 'on the ground'?!" like I was admitting to some secret that we leave the producing sitting on the ground out back, or something.

Image credits: NecroJoe


#22

I used to run a feed store in an affluent area. We sold baby chicks, which were only females, for egg laying.



This guy comes in and is adamant about needing a rooster for more egg production.



That's not the case. I explained how the reproductive, egg laying process was. He just wasn't getting it. I was at my point, and plus, the fact I couldn't order just 1 rooster, I could only order roosters in a batch of 50.



I had to put it extremely bluntly to him, and I asked him,



"Sir, does your wife need you around every month to get her period?" His jaw drops and says, "OH my, how foolish could I be. "



Another customer asking "Where is the mother chicken?"



Me, "They don't need the mother hen."



Her, "How can they survive without their mother? You buy chicken breast at the store. She needs to breastfeed!"



Me, "That's not how it works.".

Image credits: itsfroggyout


#23

Why is the front of my dishwasher blue??



…did you remove the protective film?

Image credits: gbosnorthend


#24

I used to work in a high-end liquor store that had a massive wine section and one day a lady came into the store and asked me where our "grape" wine was. I did not know how to respond. So I asked her some questions like was she looking for a specific type or brand, like a Chardonnay or a Cabernet, Pinot Grigio, Mad Dog, ripple? "Ma'am, unless the label says it is made from some other kind of fruit, this is all grape wine." But she just kept repeating that she wanted grape wine and got so mad at me and frustrated that I just did the motioning across entire aisles movement and walked away.



She wandered the aisles and finally found what she was after: Mogen David. Mogen David Concord was what she wanted.

Image credits: Valhalloween


#25

Back in the day I worked at Safeway and a woman walked up to my meat counter and started asking me where a specific sale item was, like $1 a pound chicken or something. I tell her that’s not sale we have. And she starts SCREAMING. “ YOU PEOPLE ALWAYS DO THIS! YOU BAIT AND YOU SWITCH! YOU ADVERTISE ONE THING AND THEN REFUSE TO HONOR THE PRICE! EVERYTIME SINGLE TIME I COME HERE AND IM SICK OF IT!”

She then shoves the store ad in my face and aggressively points at the $1 a pound chicken on sale.

“ Ma’am this is Safeway. That’s a Kroger ad”

She looks at it and says “ oh. Oops” and walks out as I stand there just freaking baffled at what just happened.





Also working meat department every Thanksgiving morning I would have to explain to at least 5 people that you cannot thaw and cook and 20 pound turkey by this evening.

Image credits: vagabondsean


#26

A chicken is an animal. Therefore it's not vegetarian.



Worked in a vitamin store in college and was explaining to someone that vitamin D is extracted from lanolin in sheep's wool, so it depended on if you were vegan or not.



And they hit me with fish and birds are not animals.



The specific thing she said: "What about a chicken? It's not an animal, it's a fowl!"



My assistant manager told her something like, "Oh well remember the 20 questions game? Is it animal, mineral, or vegetable? A chicken isn't an a mineral or vegetable."



They left in a huff and made huge complaints about us. Me in particular because I couldn't believe how stupid they were (and I have no poker face).



I was not/am not cut out for retail.

Image credits: LadyCiani


#27

Back when checks were popular, an older lady mistakenly wrote her check to Walmart when she was actually shopping in Kmart.



Instead of making the correction, she wanted to argue that she was shopping in a Walmart and that Kmart had gone out of business many years ago.

Image credits: DannyC990


#28

During covid: Some high stolen items were locked up and for some reason the salesfloor manager gave me; the pharmacy technician lead keys to said merchandise. A customer refused to let me touch the merchandise because of germs even though I was the one who stocked it less than 5 minutes earlier. When I explained that I touched everything in that case already she yelled at me for being gross and walked off without the product. I went back to the pharmacy and continued with my life without the product being stolen.

#29

I spent 20+ minutes arguing with a middle aged woman trying to return a XXL stack of men's underwear (against policy once opened). I explained that if her husband had a 32 inch waist like me she needed to buy him Medium size underwear.

She eventually and angrily shouted "Look, he's got a huge c**k and he needs XXL pants for it but these keep falling down when he wears them!!!!"



She would not accept my explanation that the tag size related to his waist not his junk. she raged out of the shop leaving the stack of pants behind.

Image credits: Fragmented-Rooster


#30

I actually have one for this.



Worked in car parking customer service for a few years.



Had to explain to a lady why she was being charged for an hour and a half, instead of letting her out for free under the "half an hour free" rate ... When her vehicle had been in the car park. Parked. For an hour and a half.



Her reasoning ?



"I only intended to stay 20 minutes"



"My system shows me you were here for an hour and a half"



"Yes, but I only intended to be here for 20 minutes"



"But.....you were ACTUALLY here for an hour and a half..."



Ended up having to explain over 5 minutes how rates work, and how you get charged for the time in the park.



Wild.

Image credits: de_nominator


#31

As a cashier when someone is paying cash: "hey if you can give me a penny, or a nickel I can give you a whole paper dollar back as change."



If your total was $19.10 and you gave me a $20. Give me $20.10 and I can give you a dollar bill for change rather than you carrying pesky spare change around.



This was back in the late 90s or early 00s. I know this confused people back then, it would totally explode someone's brain now.

Image credits: all4whatnot


#32

I was in a shop that just did (amazing) toasted sandwiches and 2 guys asked for a cheese toastie without the bread. The poor girl behind the counter explained over and over what a toastie was, but these 2 guys insisted. Hope they enjoyed their pile of melted cheese.

#33

Shelve of milk bone bare, offering a clear view of a completely empty cooler. "Are you out of milk?" I have no idea how I kept my job that day with all the smart a*s responses I gave. Also, a woman cursed me out on the phone because we didn't have a product. I explain that we have not carried that product in over a year. She exclames she has one in her fridge she bought last week and asked if I was calling he a liar. "No mama, but I am the dairy lead and that product when we got it came in with a three week shelf life and we haven't received any for over a year so if you bought it last week I would recommend you bring it back for a refund cause it is far out of date.".

#34

Former retail worker. The store I worked at through college would do a “friends and family” event twice a year. If you had a membership or received one of the discount cards, you received 30% off your entire purchase. The receipt showed the breakdown over each item for the discount.



There was one woman who would come in EVERYRTIME trying to return one item and would argue with our staff about why she wasn’t getting “what she paid for it.” We’d point to the item and the amount subtracted to it from the discount and she wasn’t having it. Insisted on asking for a manager everytime and causing a huge scene. She could never get it through her head that she didn’t pay full price for the item. It happened so often that staff would sigh when she’d come into the store because we knew she was going to pull the same stunt. It was exhausting.

#35

The amount of times I had to explain that any Euros can be spent the same in any country that accepts Euros and there aren't separate or specific notes for France, Germany, Greece, Spain, Austria etc etc it's scary.

#36

I worked at a grocery store in college. The local warehouse workers went on strike, meaning we were getting no product in and our shelves were getting more and more bare.



After getting yelled at by customers for a week for being out of stuff, I finally had it one night. This lady was berating me because we didn't have any chicken breast in the case. I said, "Look, there's nothing I can do about it. The warehouse is on strike and until it's resolved and they start delivering food again, I can't help you." She started screaming at me even more, saying how dare I blame the warehouse, her husband works there and if they would pay him a decent wage he wouldn't strike, blah blah blah. She immediately complained to the manager and I got written up.



Like.....tell your husband to go back to work if you need your family pack chicken so bad? I was the person with the least to do with situation here, yet she got me written up for it.

#37

If you enter your PIN in wrong 5 times for an EBT card, it will lock up and you'll have to call the number on the back to get it unlocked. This isn't something the cashier does, or the store, it's the cards way of protecting itself I guess. 





The amount of people who would scream at me, insult my intelligence, swear at me and call me names, all because they locked their card up, was insane. 





And there wasn't anything I could do but void the order or let them pay with another form of payment. Sometimes I warned them after 2 or 3 tries, but that seemed to make them angrier when it happened. 





F**k the public, man. People are so rude and hateful now days. .

#38

I took a phone call and answered all the questions that she scrolled by on our google profile. She said, “I will call back later and see if you’re busy. What’s your phone number”. I replied, “the exact same number you dialed that lead to the conversation we are having now”.

#39

Had an older (though not senior citizen) man who was 100% certain that were stealing money from his bank account because it kept showing $100 "charges" to the ATM at our location. After a series of questions he stated he sends his son in to pick up his prescriptions and gives him his debit to pay. Pointing out to him (from his own bank statement) that the $100 charges match the dates of the prescription pickups made him only more emphatic that someone from the store was using his card to steal his money.



Even pointing out that his bank statement specified the $100 as coming from an atm did nothing to sway his mind.



He stood at the front door staring at us for 20 minutes before finally leaving.



Sorry dude, your kids a d**k and you're an idiot. I cant fix either of those.

#40

I had to explain 3 for 2. If you bought 2, you could get a third one free.



They couldn't understand it. It was really bizarre.

#41

Not retail, but general tech support. Turning the monitor on and off doesn't actually turn the whole pc on and off.



The amount of times I've gotten a call about a computer not working and all that was "wrong" was that it wasn't turned on, is staggering.



I guess this would make more sense these days, but this was over a decade ago and desktop computers were everywhere.

#42

A woman tried to tell me yesterday PO Boxes no longer exist lol. I didn’t even bother. I was just like “oh, very strange” ?.

#43

I was a Maytag repairman. A customer brought in a multicolored felt mat and asked for a new one. I had to explain that was lint from the lint trap.

#44

If you put standard definition signal on an HD television it looks like s**t. Garbage in Garbage out!

#45

The number of customers to whom I've had to explain the difference between left and right is greater than zero.



These have all been adults. I wish I were kidding.