Recently, a confused woman turned to the r/TrueOffMyChest subreddit to share a conflict she had with a good friend.
“A good friend of mine broke up with her boyfriend of 6 years after she discovered he was cheating. She has recently decided to get back into dating, but she wanted the first date to be a double-date for her own comfort,” the author explained.
She and her husband were first to arrive at a restaurant. And while they were waiting for their friend’s date, the husband, without thinking too much about it, complimented the friend.
Turned out that didn’t sit well with the friend at all, who took it as a red warning sign that their marriage is about to turn sour.
A woman is left mad at her friend’s husband for complimenting her, sees it as a telltale sign of an unstable marriage
Image credits: Askar Abayev (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Liza Summer (not the actual photo)
The author later added this update about the whole situation
Image source: FrenchBread2023
“Receiving praise from others elicits discomfort when it conflicts with one’s existing belief system”
While some people adore being praised by others, whether it’s for their achievements or looks, others feel uncomfortable if someone compliments them. Guy Winch, Ph.D., a licensed psychologist, keynote speaker and author, argues that it comes down to the fact that our receptivity to compliments is a reflection of our self-esteem and deep feelings of self-worth.
“Compliments can make people with low self-esteem feel uncomfortable because they contradict their own self-views,” Winch argues in Psychology Today. According to him, “People actively seek to verify their own perceptions of themselves, whether those are positive or negative.”
“If we believe we’re truly undesirable, hearing compliments about how attractive we are will feel jarring and inauthentic. If we believe we’re unintelligent, someone lavishing us with praise about how smart we are will feel more like a taunt than a compliment. And if we’re convinced we’re incapable of success, receiving praise about how capable we are can feel like a set-up for future heartbreak and disappointment,” Winch explained.
And this is how people reacted
The post "She Can Work On That In Therapy": Woman Warns Her Friend After Her Husband Compliments Her first appeared on Bored Panda.
